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Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Where can I go?

 Its been a tough week so far and its only Tuesday. House is a mess from trying to sort things out so we can pack to move, kids not wanting to do all their school work, the baby was sick all day and last night, packing needs done for youth extreme, and this mama feeling overwhelmed. Through it all though I keep singing the song Where could I go but to the Lord. He already knows what I am going through and he has been helping me, normally I would be biting everyone's head off but Praise the Lord he has given me an extra dose of patience. My hubby has even mentioned how nice I have been. This makes me glad and sad because I know I have not always been nice when in transition. I have a very quick temper and have trouble keeping it tamed down.
 I am going to be honest with myself and you all, sometimes I get so upset I feel everyone should know it. Unfortunately this is wrong and it takes time and the Lord to help me with this. I hate change but its necessary, and worth it in the end. At times I chaff under the responsibilities of being a SAHM, homeschooling, and even being the wife I need to be to my husband. I can't express it to many people but I can go to the Lord who knows that I love to be free but also be the best mother and wife. He knows how contradictory I am in my mind yet I will still follow His will. So in this season of my life I am taking it a moment at a time. If my house is in disorder that's OK we are moving this happens. The children are not wanting to get school done its OK, we keep at it, that's the freedom of homeschooling. Baby was sick we just cuddle and pray. I will have everything ready in time I always do. I will lean even more on the Lord, have a song in my heart and a smile on my face. When the new problem arise which it will, I will keep my cool and go with the flow.
  This has been a process I have been going through and I wanted to share with you how the Lord has helped me, maybe your going through some transitions, or just finding it a little difficult to be wife, mother, keeper at home, teacher, nurse, or whatever it is your struggling with, just go to the Lord. Like the song says:
      Oh where could I go, oh where I could I go,
      seeking a refuge for my soul. Needing a friend
      to save me in the end. Where could I go but to the Lord.